July 07, 2014

Loving my closet.


I’m terribly embarrassed at how I let my closet go. But what better place to free myself of my embarrassment of my closet than to let it all *hang* out than in theouteraisle; the place where shame melts away and brutiful truth telling takes her place.

I am sure that there are other people that feel this way about their closets, but we don't always talk about them, let alone show them in the raw bright day of light. I believe that the more we talk about the messiness we feel around our closets, the better we will feel and most importantly, we will take action to both accept the way our closets are AND make positive changes.

Over the last several months, I prioritized other things above my closet and I haven’t been taking good care of her as you can plainly see. The things that I have been putting in my closet have been dirty and not cared for; crumpled, frayed and blah. I know what it could be, but I just haven’t had the energy.

Because I haven't had the energy, I haven’t planned out my outfits for weeks. I haven’t kept up on sorting the good clothes from the bad; which means my outfits have been getting sloppier and sloppier.  My clothes have been less appealing and I have been wearing the same thing over and over, sometimes even wearing clothes picked up from off the floor. Clearly, I haven’t respected closet and her gift; what she was made for.

I had enough. 

I hit the tipping point. 

I want to wear the outfits that make me feel good and keep me motivated to be my best self.  

So this weekend I did a major overhaul of the clothes I typically wear. I got rid of clothes I didn't need; I planned out outfits I love and that make me feel good; and I already am caring for and feel better about my closet.  Fantastic really!  I even got my daughter to help me this weekend with the clothes and planning outfits!  Because of this mental and physical shift, there is space in my closet for running, relaxing, working and reading. My closet feels so much more put together!  

For me, it is pretty much impossible to always wear clean clothes; Sometimes I just have to break down and wear a quick, unplanned outfit. However, it IS possible to wear cleanER clothes. 

I vow to look at my closet everyday and be grateful for the abundant clothes I have. And if I find myself frowning at my closet, if I treat it poorly, I will start again.  Every day is a new day.  

Now, read this WHOLE POST again and replace the following words:
closet = body
outfits = meals
clothes = food
wear = eat
It is truly amazing how when something like getting one’s food in order ends up affecting so much more in one’s life, like taking good care of one’s closet. 

Here is my closet today. 

July 02, 2014

Bounce back.

So hey. Long time.

It’s probably not a surprise that someone who has lost 60lbs, 3x over wouldn't stay at goal weight forever.

But I was kind of surprised. After maintaining for 3 ½ years, I started to see the scale creep back up. And it kept creeping and creeping….

Creepin Creeper

The thing is we are not here to strive for perfection; I believe we are here to live, love, and learn. And all of those things cannot happen without a few mistakes. The trick is how we respond to the mistake. When it comes to weight loss, often time the damage isn’t done when we slip up, but when we try to get BACK on plan.

How do you feel when you slip up?

For me, I get this ridiculous voice in my head that goes something like this:

“Just skip this meeting, lose the pounds you gained, get back to goal and THEN go.”

“Just one last hurrah before I go back on plan.”
“Just go once a month so you don’t have to pay EVERY time. (then go never.)”
“I’ll get up to run tomorrow when it is cooler.”
“I’m too busy to plan my meals.”
“It is going to take forever to get this weight off.”
“Go gluten free, that will work. Thank goodness chocolate is gluten free!”

So we slip up on occasion. Or in my case, slip up and try to get back on for a year.

When you break a dish, do you break the whole set? (The Napa house would be pretty P.O.’d if that were the case….)

How can you spot a slip?

For me, I notice when I stop tracking, stop “caring”, start isolating (Don’t Isolate! – ADT), or when the clothes get tight. I have been sliding for some time and I don’t want to go sliding to another weight gain. Instead, I grabbed on. I got myself back to meetings, got myself back on the boards talking with friends to keep me accountable and I am writing. Writing even when I am terribly embarrassed for gaining.

But this is a JOURNEY not a destination. That would be boring. On this journey I’ve tried new things like:

How to get back on track? 

  • Snap & TrackI’ve taken pictures of my food to show my girlfriends. (I’m not going to eat that because I do NOT want my beloved accountable partner to see I ate THAT!)
  • Text a friend – when I feel frustrated or anxious, instead of isolating and heading to the pantry, I reach out. 
  • Go to meetings – I’ve gone to 7 straight meetings and on one meeting I knew it was going to be a tough weigh in, so I skipped the weigh in and just went to the meeting. In my 11 years at WW, I have never skipped a WI and stayed for a meeting . Before, I’d skip the meeting all together or weigh in and dash out. It finally dawned on me that going past the weigh in counter and sitting in the chair for a meeting is more important than the 10 seconds on the scale. 
  • Track everything or Simple Start – I had a lovely girls weekend this weekend (In NAPA!!!!) and I was really, really tempted to not track. To just throw in the towel and face plant into the pizza, blueberry French toast, curry chicken, caramels, brownies, wine, wine, wine. Besides, I was running 13.1 miles --- who needs to track???!! But I did. I knew it was going to be bad. I had 3 more than 40 P+ days (I get 26P+), but I managed to still lose. If I didn’t track, I’m sure I would have kept eating without regard to the full feelings, because it all tasted do darn good. But now, I remember it tasting good, not the gross feeling of an overeaten-overfilled stomach.

All this paid off. I got to celebrate today with two new charms as I hit my 25lb loss since I first joined WW and for finishing my 9th half marathon this weekend (whoohooo!) 

OK sweetpeas, what is one piece of advice you would like to give yourself to get back on track?