My go to activity of choice.
I'm not sure for how long, I have a dr. appointment this afternoon. But I am on day 7 with no run for me and the longest I've gone without running since I started running in December. Boo.
Actually "boo" is really and understatement. How I really feel is more like....
Oh my #$%@ing foot. I can't #$%@ing believe that I can't #$%@ing RUN.
I am going KRAZY and not in the Pitbull "Yo mama, she gets krazy" kind of way.
See, I have a couple races coming up. Saturday, I am running (I hope) a 5k with a team of First Church Somerville runners in support of the Somerville Homeless Coalition. Every year the team runs it and this was going to be my first year. Last year I remember seeing the runners and thinking how I would love to do it, but I was no way in shape to run a 5k. 3.1 miles? I didn't think I could handle it and I would completely embarrass myself. So I just donated to the team instead. But this year I wanted to be apart of the team. For the last 3 years running (heh) FCS brought in more $$ for the SHC than any other team.
Then there is the big race. The Newport, RI half marathon on Oct. 17th. It isn't October yet, so I am putting this one out of my head thinking, hoping, praying, assuming I will be completely fine by then. Yes. Of course I will. I have to be. Sigh.
Frankly, I don't think I can write about any other alternative, because I don't want to start crying. This is the race that my friend Sarah and I decided to sign up for and train for way back in July. The race will be our first face to face meeting after chatting and emailing back and forth for the last 10 months or so.
I read recently about how we often pour our hearts out to our running buddies because there is something about focusing on the road in front of you that makes it easier to open up your heart and just let it all go. I feel like that with my virtual running buddies too. Sure, there is a connection that we have all doing weight watchers, graduating from couch25k, or running in general, but it is more than just that. There is something about writing; writing out your thoughts and a willingness to share something that you may not share verbally with a friend over lunch. I feel like we are able to open up to one another so very easily.
As I was thinking about this post, I got a very lovely email/prayer from my frenpastor, Molly. Someone who I have no problem opening up my heart to, and treasure every time we talk, or email or as I read her blog. (Ironically, the last run before sidelining was a beautiful one from my work to downtown Boston through the parks in JP. I wanted to see how long it would take me to do a round trip to Dana-Farber to visit Molly during her treatments.)
In her email she wrote: "And God heal her foot. But not before she has to learn some other new way to fly."
So, as grumpy and cranky it makes me that I am on the DL (TEMPORARY DL...hear that God?!) I will take the time to reflect and get some lessons on flying.
I'm not done learning, but here are some things that have been running (heh.) through my head.
1. Cherish runs. Past and future. Good ones and sucky ones. I wish we can all have "enough" yucky ones to really appreciate "enough" yummy ones. Gratitude. Yeah, I'll take that lesson.
2. There is more to life than just running. Really? Oh my. Yes, it completes me, like that last puzzle piece, but wait, there are a whole heck of a lot of puzzle pieces in a 1000 piece puzzle than the one that completes it. I guess you could also put the mama, spouse, christian, writer, cleanER eater, cook, musician, friend puzzle piece in there last and they would all complete the puzzle too. So maybe I have more puzzle pieces that can complete for a spell. I love the Ani Difranco song, 32 flavors and then some. Totally my theme song.
BUT, I still do need to move. NEED to move. I used to swim, even was a lifeguard. And I used to bike everywhere I went; no car for years. Maybe I need to tap into those flavors. Tri-anything? Tri-something?
3. Funkalicious. I do NOT want this to become a funk. I out-right stubbornly refuse.
Now if only I could tell my stomach to stop growling, my fingers to stop reaching for the carbs and the scale to stay put...
In the mean time, I will *try* to take this (however long this is) as a learning experience rather than something that is messing with my routine. Chalk it up to the price of being a runner and treat my mind and body like I would anyone that needs time to heal. Gently. Flexibly. Time to inspect and adapt.
And another case of the ironics...I *JUST* talked about change, transition, and transformation and how much I luuuuurrrve it. I don't know what stage I am in at this point and I don't think it really matters. What I do know is that I will keep on going, moving forward towards transformation. So no funks, just transition.
There. Three Things.
The truth is, this is probably just tendinitis in my foot from going to hard too fast with the Vibrams and running too many days in a row.
(Mer, don't roll your eyes at me! But yeah, feel free to give me a big 'ol "toldyaso" this weekend. :-/ )
Yes, the irony is that I started running in the VFF to prevent injury. Anyway, if it is "just" tendinitis, I am *only* looking at 10-14 days rest according to my self-diagnosis via the interwebs. 10-14 days in the grand scheme ain't nothin'. So I really should just suck it up be done with the dramatic vent.
Not quite the same lunch break sweat session as I would like, but I did work my fingers a bit with this here post. Oh shoot! Tendinitis, stay away from my hands, you hear?!
What do you do when you are faced with a set back in your life, work, exercise program or food wise? What did you do or wish you did?